Fox hunting problems.

[cityslicker]

It seems my thoroughbred steed has stained my riding pants with his inccesant sweating. My butler, Geives, has so tried his very best to remove them. Poor chap has contracted a blood borne disease from the different concoctions he did endevour.
Also, it seems that I'm having trouble keeping the ice fresh for my Martinis. Could it be the brand of olives I am using?
Also my Master of Hounds seems to have developed a rather nasty disposition after being told his horse was being taken away. Seems the other club members found the expense rather taxing and the decision was made to provide him with a Sedgeway, which is easier and more economical to maintain. Would you recommend that I lash him about the head and shoulders or across the buttocks to get him back in line?
Your help and advise would be greatly appreciated.

[foxalleykennels]

Tis the troubles in life which we endure that strengthen our resolve. Yet if once a solution is known, then proceed with diligence until ye have obtained a most satisfying result. The head and shoulders, I say no man! The lashing of his buttocks will reign in his pride.

[rodman]

uuuhhhh-tallyho? ;D ;D

[southerntradition]

wow that whole discourse flew right over my head

[bulletproof]

southerntradition said:

wow that whole discourse flew right over my head

..ill second that

[the fire man]

all i can say is wtf lol lol

[slickrock]

ice in a martini?!?!!?!

such a travesty should never occur...

"Now attend me, Diana and the Nymphs, Pan, Orion, and the Satyrs, for I have a task in hand which may hardly be accomplished without some divine aid. And the lesson I would teach is one as to which even gods must differ, and no two men will ever hold exactly the same opinion. Indeed, no written lesson, no spoken words, no lectures, be they ever so often repeated, will teach any man to ride to hounds. The art must come of nature and of experience; and Orion, were he here, could only tell the tyro of some few blunders which he may avoid, or give him a hint or two as to the manner in which he should begin.


Let it be understood that I am speaking of fox-hunting, and let the young beginner always remember that in hunting the fox a pack of hounds is needed. The huntsman, with his servants, and all the scarlet-coated horsemen in the field, can do nothing towards the end for which they are assembled without hounds.

He who as yet knows nothing of hunting will imagine that I am laughing at him in saying this; but, after a while, he will know how needful it is to bear in mind the caution I here give him, and will see how frequently men seem to forget that a fox cannot be hunted without hounds. A fox is seen to break from the covert, and men ride after it; the first man, probably, being some cunning sinner, who would fain get off alone if it were possible, and steal a march upon the field. But in this case one knave makes many fools; and men will rush, and ride along the track of the game, as though they could hunt it, and will destroy the scent before the hounds are on it,--following, in their ignorance, the footsteps of the cunning sinner. Let me beg my young friend not to be found among this odious crowd of marplots. His business is to ride to hounds; and let him do so from the beginning of the run, persevering through it all, taking no mean advantages, and allowing himself to be betrayed into as few mistakes as possible; but let him not begin before the beginning. If he could know all that is inside the breast of that mean man who commenced the scurry, the cunning man who desires to steal a march, my young friend would not wish to emulate him. With nine-tenths of the men who flutter away after this ill fashion there is no design of their own in their so riding. They simply wish to get away, and in their impatience forget the little fact that a pack of hounds is necessary for the hunting of a fox. "

[cityslicker]

I digress, the ice is for the Bloody Mary's. "Odius marplots"? snicker,snicker.....

[foxalleykennels]

Bloody Mary! Martini! This, I have discovered to be the problem. Should we fore go the wicked spirits which ravage our bodies and cloud our minds then we would clearly see that even the beloved sport of fox hunting have men who are not to be held in high esteem. It is preposterous for a man to ride before the hounds. Does this fool think himself greater than the hounds who pursue the scent of their quarry. It is the hounds who own the chase not a simple minded man who's good judgment abandoned him at an early age. To feed and nurture the hounds, this is our responsibility. Let the hounds pursue the game and quickly call out those who would cause the demise of the fundamental principles on which our sport was founded.

[cityslicker]

I like that, Fox. We all need to keep the spirit of the hunt and the chase in mind each time we venture into the field.
TALLYHO EVERYONE!!!!!!!!!

[foxalleykennels]

I have really enjoyed this thread! You are right if we take away the joy of the chase then there is nothing left. Happy hunting to all!!!!!